Unreliable Postcard: Milan Part 1

Byharrymottram

 Oct 7, 2025

By Harry Mottram: Go to the best restaurants in Italy they said, visit the Duomo and see the views from the top they said. Milan is the shopping capital of the world they said. For someone who sees Millets and TK Maxx as high-end retail, a meal deal as cuisine and the view of Cheddar Reservoir from Crook Peak as good as it gets, maybe Milan was not for me. But with its numerous small grocery stores, cobbled streets and a surprise around every corner of its graffiti covered streets it was just the sort of urban grunge I like. It’s alive and full of action from fashion shoots in the streets to bust ups between drivers, snogging couples and the constant clunk and clink of the trundling trams.

The guides to the city talk only of the ‘iconic’ cathedral, the Duomo, and the vast 19^th century shopping galleries – but don’t mention gaggles of students gossiping and smoking, or the chaotic morning rush hour with cyclists using the pavements, motorcycles battling the taxis and the queues in MacDonalds for a burger breakfast.

To visit the Galleria Emmanuelle II shopping mall or the Duomo is an invitation to become a sardine squashed into vast crowds where breathing is difficult and admiring  the famous building is impossible. So, Linda and I took one look at the crowds and headed down side streets past La Scala with its mile long queue to the peace of the botanical gardens and compiled this unreliable mini guide to Milan instead.

The trams

Popular, noisy, bumpy and likely to send you to the floor as they round a bend, but easy to use as you swipe a bank card as you enter and exit to pay. They travel along the streets – often the very narrow ones – with routes marked out on street signs by raised pavement tram stops. Bring them back to the cities of England with their clunking, clanking and banging wheels as they stop and start in the busy streets.

Grocery stores

There’s a Conan, Carrefour, Pam or Esselunga seemingly around every corner but when you retrace your steps to find one they disappear since they rarely have any signs outside preferring to remain indiscrete. Despite no baked beans or copies of the Radio Times on sale they have a huge selection of pasta, olive oil, cheese and wine. We were self-catering so they are a Godsend. And the ultimate Italian deli is Eataly – a shrine to all things Italian that can be drunk or eaten – a shop that Linda insisted we visit where you can also have lunch – which we did. No restaurants for us with their plastic covered photos of pizzas and pasta dishes outside their doors so you can point at what you want – instead home cooking with the best ingredients.

Toilets

Many years ago when I still had acne and dandruff I experienced a trauma which damaged me for decades. I was in France at a campsite, and the only toilets were those hole in the ground ones. Apart from having no idea to use them they were disgusting. I’ve experienced various public toilets since then that are either dirty, broken or the stuff that should go in the pan are spread over the floor and walls. The ones in the parks in Milan are those portable ones delivered by a lorry. Dirty doesn’t really do them justice but at least they had toilet paper. Not a word about them in the Lonely Planet guide. The ones in museums are nearly always the best in public loos – it must be part of their mission – to educate and to ensure we have an acceptable visit to the lavatory. And I can honestly say the ones in the museum of the hospital – or the I Tesori della Ca’ Granda – which is part of the University of Milan – is the best public toilet, the cleanest public toilet that I’ve ever experienced. The museum is free and is run by those wonderful public-spirited people in The Italian Touring Club – an organisation dedicated to helping people visit and enjoy aspects of the country – dating back to the 19^th century when it began as a benevolent cycling club. See https://www.touringclub.it/

Cobbles

One downside of cobbled streets is they can be prised up and used as missiles to throw at the police – which happened in Milan shortly before we arrived. A demonstration in support of the people of Gaza was hijacked by a few people who took the opportunity to damage the city’s streets by removing many of the cobblestones and chucking them at the lines of constables. The result was there were a lot of gaps in the cobblestones – which in places have large gaps between each one anyway – large enough for a heal to get stuck – or a fifty pence piece to be lost. It explains why even little old ladies were wearing trainers as they are very bumpy – but picturesque at the same time.

Fashion

It’s the fashion capital of the world they said. Sadly, not so. No different from any city in England with its mix of sweatshirts, torn jeans, puffer jackets, trainers and Doc Marten boots. It was the start of October so locals were clad in heavy coats and anoraks as though it was near freezing. Almost all women were wearing trousers – this was noted by Linda – while hardly anyone wore a hat – something that marked the city down in my opinion. A wall painting of a model by Catherine Opie summed it up – she had a look of disappointment as she studied the populace below.

Aperol Spritz

I’ve always had a weakness for the bitter taste of Campari – partly due to a crush on Lorraine Chase who used to advertise the aperitif in the 1970s, but while in Milan I opted for a search for Aperol Spritz made by the same firm and not so strong. I had seen an advert on EasyJet for it and thought wrongly it was the drink of the city. It took several searches in supermarkets to find a bottle. Aperol was sold but only in a large bottle which I might not have got through – so the amber coloured spritz version was my choice. And like Limencello in Naples and Absinthe in Nice it hit the spot and is my only go to drink – along with all the others.

People

Some Italians speak loudly – they can hold a conversation with a friend 50 metres away across four lanes of traffic and not lose a word meaning you can eavesdrop on what they are saying – if only you can speak Italian. However, I was able to interpret what I believe various couples were saying by observing their body language. These included one couple arguing about the offside rule – she was wearing an Inter Milan FC shirt and I’m sure I heard the word ‘football’ spoken.

While waiting for a taxi at the airport a middle-aged woman wearing a very short skirt came running out of Arrivals and leapt into the arms of a tall grey-haired man and began the longest snog I’ve witnessed since 1976  when Stephen Dingle snogged Jocelyn Lock at Richard Scott’s 18^th birthday party – it lasted for over six minutes 32 seconds. OK, it wasn’t a conversation, but it still counts as their lips were moving. And yes, I did time it.

Another aspect of people watching in a tourist area is the way they joyously and unself-consciously take selfies. Sometimes with a selfie stick but normally just holding up their phone while as many of their friends or relatives group themselves so as to be in the picture while grinning at the held aloft device. In Milan selfie heaven is in front of the Duomo where there is plenty of room with the cathedral as a backdrop – and frankly you can spend ages there watching this act of public exuberance as they inwardly tick off the act by saying ‘I’ve been to Milan.’

At dawn the piazza in front of the Duomo has Internet Influencers making videos for their TikTok sites. A middle aged man in a white suit dancing in front of a camera and a sound man, Japanese girls doing a sort of choreographed move while a boyfriend filmed them – and on one day a fashion shoot – with a row of models dressed in red going through a routine. Milan – I love you.